When I was so hung-ho about my writing, and began publishing this blog, I was also more open to exploring and exposing my creative side. Five years later it seems my creativity has been pushed to the side.
I was curious about traveling back in time to my 5 year ago self, and took the opportunity to fish a some-times-but-not-often used journal out of my pack. Mixed in with meeting notes and a few to-do lists were entries from a writing workshop I attended at Earlham School of Religion in November 2017.
I guess one of the assignments was to write a prayer. Or I assigned myself the task of writing a prayer. However it happened, I have a powerful prayer penned into this occasional book. Waiting.
So almost five years later I offer this prayer a chance to live in the open. To come out of hiding – maybe like my writing. And the words still ring true.
Here it is…
Help thou my unbelief... ...for trusting that I am enough is heavy-lifting. The layers of lies that weigh down my glory are too burdensome for me; at least they are today. I want to be able to believe in my worthiness, to do this seemingly simple task of acceptance on my own. But I find myself trapped in the muck of misinformation, the accumulated decay of lies told to me - and told by me - over these fifty-plus years. May Grace abound and bend gravity. May Light lighten and lift my spirit. May the mirror's image clear, the reflection sharpen, into crisp focus. So that I can - perhaps in just this eternal moment - see myself as You see me. Maybe then I can believe. November 4, 2017
Beautiful Ted!
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Thanks Lou. It is great to have space to write and reflect. Glad to share some of my heart.
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