Lineage

A peculiar type of privilege I acknowledge is the ability to trace my family line back 10 generations or more.

The Taylors (father’s family) appear to have emigrated to this continent almost 380 years ago: my 9th great grandfather Robert Taylor (also my father’s name) traveled from Devon, England in 1646 landed in Massachusetts and died 2 years later in Connecticut. His descendants eventually moved to western New York and Pennsylvania, where many of the Taylors still live (around Bradford, PA). My paternal grandmother’s family settled in the same area in the mid-19th century. The Daltons escaped the Irish potato famine to establish farms in the rocky rises of the Allegheny valley.

The other side of my family has called the coastal region of northeastern North Carolina home for centuries. Tristram Hardison, my mother’s 7th paternal grandfather, emigrated from the York, England area in the 1650s, arriving in Maine and starting his family there. His grandson Jasper traveled down the coast as a teenager, and established a new family settlement in the Albemarle Sound region of North Carolina in the early 18th century. My mother’s maternal line, the Bass family, I just discovered, has an even longer history in that region. Captain John William Basse (my 10th great-grandfather), born in London, England in 1616, was brought to the Jamestown Settlement area by his father when he was 3 years old. A native tribal rebellion, when John was only 6, killed many of the European settlers in that region while his parents were traveling back to England on business, and he survived as an orphan adopted by the Nansemond indigenous tribe. He eventually married a Nansemond tribal leader’s daughter, and their progeny now populates much of south-eastern North America. A well-written account of this amazing story, penned by a distant cousin, follows:

John Basses’ Story

My curiosity around this family history began many years ago, inspired by a desire to address my experience of family trauma. In my genealogical research I gathered work done by other relatives and, over many years, have charted an extensive map of relationships on Ancestry.com ( https://www.ancestry.com/family-tree/tree/17940327?cfpid=581378941 ). Though incomplete and with many errors I’m still correcting, this tree has helped me reflect on the stories that give me my foundation. And I know that having access to these stories carries immense privilege. I know of many dear friends whose ancestors were forcibly brought to this continent, and thus do not have the same paper trial I have access to. (A disturbing fact of my family story: many of my ancestors recorded wealth included ownership of enslaved people of African descent). And others have their lineage cloaked in sealed adoption records. So I am grateful that many strong branches of my tree are available to explore.

My journey through these generations has helped to give context to present-day trauma. I have found that families share pain in paths influenced by both nature and nurture. We escaped persecution (political / religious), we sought wealth, we faced war and violence, we endured poverty; my family survived. But not without scars that our DNA transferred forward generationally, and not without imbedded behaviors that have been imprinted upon each member.

So today, I offer reverence and respect to a special survivor: my 10th great-grandfather John Basse – who came to this continent as an infant on his mother’s hip, who was raised by indigenous North Americans, who married a tribal princess, and whose descendants have endured for over 400 years on this continent.

Scars and strength.

Five Year’s Faith Journey

When I was so hung-ho about my writing, and began publishing this blog, I was also more open to exploring and exposing my creative side. Five years later it seems my creativity has been pushed to the side.

I was curious about traveling back in time to my 5 year ago self, and took the opportunity to fish a some-times-but-not-often used journal out of my pack. Mixed in with meeting notes and a few to-do lists were entries from a writing workshop I attended at Earlham School of Religion in November 2017.

I guess one of the assignments was to write a prayer. Or I assigned myself the task of writing a prayer. However it happened, I have a powerful prayer penned into this occasional book. Waiting.

So almost five years later I offer this prayer a chance to live in the open. To come out of hiding – maybe like my writing. And the words still ring true.

Here it is…

Help thou my unbelief...

...for trusting that I am enough is heavy-lifting.
The layers of lies that weigh down my glory are too burdensome for me;
at least they are today.

I want to be able to believe in my worthiness,
to do this seemingly simple task of acceptance on my own.

But I find myself trapped in the muck of misinformation, 
the accumulated decay of lies told to me - and told by me - over these fifty-plus years.

May Grace abound and bend gravity.
May Light lighten and lift my spirit.
May the mirror's image clear, the reflection sharpen, into crisp focus.

So that I can - perhaps in just this eternal moment - see myself as You see me.

Maybe then I can believe.
November 4, 2017

Too Long?

I did have grand plans several years ago. To work regularly on my writing. To accept that I can wander with words creating a meaningful path. To get my ideas out there.

And then my plans went fuputz.

Maybe my work at the hospital got in the way. Or my aging dog’s end of life care. Or a pandemic. I can list many legitimate excuses.

Instead, I’ll just welcome myself back to this platform. I also took the dive and added a new professional email address: ttaylor@publisheroftruth.com. Amazing what the space of a spring vacation can do for creativity!

Too long since the last post, but making sure this post is not too long!